PBA 019e

[2/7/2014 11:23:06 PM] Janis: ((Where do I find Bellami))

[2/7/2014 11:25:12 PM] Kestrel: Down the stairs nearly to the exit-hatch thing, sitting on the ground, crying.

[2/7/2014 11:25:22 PM] Janis: ...Bell?

[2/7/2014 11:25:46 PM] Kestrel: She wipes her eyes hastily, sitting up straight. "Yes?"

[2/7/2014 11:25:57 PM] Janis: I just wanted to make sure you were ok?

[2/7/2014 11:26:39 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: I'm fine. ... it isn't easy to discuss one's humiliation in a roomful of strangers.

[2/7/2014 11:26:53 PM] Janis: Janis walks over and sits by her

[2/7/2014 11:26:56 PM] Janis: Sorry.

[2/7/2014 11:27:06 PM] Janis: If it makes you feel better...this seems to happen a lot.

[2/7/2014 11:27:31 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: Public shaming? We don't have such a custom at home. ... I wish I were still there.

[2/7/2014 11:28:00 PM] Janis: What's it look like?

[2/7/2014 11:28:52 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: The part where I live? It's mostly mountains. I live in a city, mostly made of white stone--it gleams in the daylight. They call it the City of Fountains.

[2/7/2014 11:29:14 PM] Janis: That sounds really pretty.

[2/7/2014 11:30:15 PM] Janis: I'm sorry you got taken away.

[2/7/2014 11:30:27 PM] Janis: Pretty much everyone here wants to get home.

[2/7/2014 11:31:16 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... I don't think I can face the others again. Is there somewhere I can just... go to be alone?

[2/7/2014 11:31:26 PM] Janis: ...you wanna see the forest?

[2/7/2014 11:31:32 PM] Janis: Janis smiles at her

[2/7/2014 11:31:54 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... a park? Is that the only place?

[2/7/2014 11:32:04 PM] Janis: It's not really a park.

[2/7/2014 11:32:20 PM] Janis: But so long as you're there, Talas can make it so nobody finds you.

[2/7/2014 11:32:26 PM] Janis: Assuming you don't want to be found.

[2/7/2014 11:33:59 PM] Janis: Kes knows how to hide other places, but not me so much.

[2/7/2014 11:34:45 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: I don't want to be found. ... I didn't want anyone to find that out.

[2/7/2014 11:35:00 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: It's humiliating.

[2/7/2014 11:35:07 PM] Janis: .........I can get that.

[2/7/2014 11:35:21 PM] Janis: Everyone here has stuff they don't like the others knowing.

[2/7/2014 11:35:29 PM] Janis: But it all seems to get out eventually.

[2/7/2014 11:35:42 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... people don't realize what it's like.

[2/7/2014 11:37:53 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: You hold a child inside for a year, and then it's... painful, when you bring it into the world. And I have done this many times. I hear the cry and I know it's there, but I'm never permitted to hold it. Never permitted to touch or even see.

[2/7/2014 11:38:39 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... that's how it should be, of course. None of them are mine, not truly.

[2/7/2014 11:38:49 PM] Janis: ...they're not?

[2/7/2014 11:39:40 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: They're temple children. Conceived at temple, born there. All temple children belong to the goddess; we are only vessels.

[2/7/2014 11:40:18 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... but I hear the cries in my dreams.

[2/7/2014 11:40:36 PM] Janis: .................

[2/7/2014 11:40:53 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: They *feel* like they should be yours.

[2/7/2014 11:41:06 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... you're too young for this sort of talk. I'm sorry.

[2/7/2014 11:41:14 PM] Janis: I am not.

[2/7/2014 11:41:32 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... oh. Then I'm sorry I believed you were.

[2/7/2014 11:41:50 PM] Janis: ..............Just cause I don't really get it doesn't mean I'm too young.

[2/7/2014 11:42:38 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... oh. What don't you understand?

[2/7/2014 11:42:59 PM] Janis: Well, I mean...I don't get why people want to do it.

[2/7/2014 11:43:11 PM] Janis: It just sounds gross, and then you're stuck with this gross thing.

[2/7/2014 11:44:28 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... a baby, you mean? Well, from what I've heard, they do come *out* rather disgusting, but they are rather important. If people don't produce children society cannot maintain itself. We are always on the brink of extinction; if it weren't for the temples we would likely have disappeared thousands of years ago.

[2/7/2014 11:44:55 PM] Janis: ....that sucks.

[2/7/2014 11:45:21 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: Everyone wants children. If it weren't for the temples people would kill each other to steal other people's.

[2/7/2014 11:45:34 PM] Janis: ............that sucks more.

[2/7/2014 11:45:41 PM] Janis: ....why do you wanna go back to that?

[2/7/2014 11:46:24 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... I had retired from my temple work. But I still had a high position. It is very rare for a priestess to bear more than two or three children in a lifetime.

[2/7/2014 11:46:50 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: ... I was quite important, at home. Before I came here and became no one.

[2/7/2014 11:47:04 PM] Janis: You're not no one.

[2/7/2014 11:47:09 PM] Janis: You're part of the crew.

[2/7/2014 11:48:10 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: I can't face them again.

[2/7/2014 11:48:32 PM] Janis: ..................I'm really not sure I know what to say.

[2/7/2014 11:49:39 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: There's not much *to* say. I should never have retired; clearly she is angry at me.

[2/7/2014 11:49:48 PM] Janis: ....who?

[2/7/2014 11:50:10 PM] Kestrel: Bellami sniffles. "The goddess, Cyrene."

[2/7/2014 11:50:26 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: I'm here, am I not?

[2/7/2014 11:50:56 PM] Janis: ........you think the Gods are mad at us?

[2/7/2014 11:51:10 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: No. My goddess is most certainly angry with me.

[2/7/2014 11:51:40 PM] Janis: But if you're here because of that, that means we all pissed off Gods.

[2/7/2014 11:51:49 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: Fourteen children I gave her, and since I left her service, nothing for me. And now this place, where there is no respect and very little to be had of kindness.

[2/7/2014 11:52:30 PM] Janis: I'm sorry that Allys was a jerk, but we're not all like that.

[2/7/2014 11:52:41 PM] Janis: Larry is one of the most respectful people I know.

[2/7/2014 11:53:03 PM] Janis: And Kes tries to be nice to everyone.

[2/7/2014 11:53:23 PM] Janis: And...and...

[2/7/2014 11:53:37 PM] Janis: Wynn would stand up for anyone here if she had to.

[2/7/2014 11:53:48 PM] Janis: And Lira doesn't always think but she means well.

[2/7/2014 11:53:55 PM] Janis: And you don't know anything about us!

[2/7/2014 11:54:18 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: No. But now you know all the worst things about me.

[2/7/2014 11:54:31 PM] Janis: We know one thing. And not that well.

[2/7/2014 11:54:40 PM] Janis: ...and I still don't really understand it.

[2/7/2014 11:55:49 PM] Janis: But you can't just say that we know you from one thing.

[2/7/2014 11:55:55 PM] Janis: You can't be that simple.

[2/7/2014 11:56:45 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: No. I don't understand why she objected in the first place.

[2/7/2014 11:57:30 PM] Janis: Allys?

[2/7/2014 11:57:50 PM] Kestrel: Bellami: How could it harm her if I were to have a child of my own?

[2/7/2014 11:58:08 PM] Janis: ...I think she just found it gross that you'd do it with her brother.

[2/7/2014 11:58:33 PM] Janis: Also, Allys has a massive stick up her butt. She doesn't like it when anyone does anything.

[2/7/2014 11:59:32 PM] Kestrel: Bellami nods.

[2/8/2014 12:00:16 AM] Janis: Look, just spend some time by yourself, and this will all seem better later.

[2/8/2014 12:00:19 AM] Janis: ...I think.

[2/8/2014 12:00:55 AM] Kestrel: Bellami nods. "Show me where to go. Preferably somewhere with a bath tub. Please tell me there are bathtubs here."

[2/8/2014 12:01:12 AM] Janis: We have showers

[2/8/2014 12:01:20 AM] Janis: ((Do we have bathtubs?))

[2/8/2014 12:01:46 AM] Nation: ((Yep.))

[2/8/2014 12:01:47 AM] Kestrel: ((yep.))

[2/8/2014 12:01:56 AM] Kestrel: Bellami stands up, brushing off her dress.

[2/8/2014 12:02:07 AM] Janis: Janis shows her to the showers

[2/8/2014 12:02:16 AM] Janis: I'll go get some clothes to leave out for you.

[2/8/2014 12:03:03 AM] Kestrel: Bellami nods.

[2/8/2014 12:03:20 AM] Kestrel: ((might wanna tell her about A ROOM too.))

[2/8/2014 12:03:39 AM] Janis: When you're done, the bedrooms are there

[2/8/2014 12:03:48 AM] Kestrel: Bellami nods.

[2/8/2014 12:03:53 AM] Janis: Janis points to the bedrooms and leads her to one in particular.

[2/8/2014 12:03:58 AM] Janis: You can have this one

[2/8/2014 12:04:39 AM] Janis: Anyway, you go take a bath and I'll get you clothes

[2/8/2014 12:04:51 AM] Kestrel: Bellami nods.

[2/8/2014 12:05:00 AM] Kestrel: ((And you can just assume that's done and she's situated.))